#all the silly little skk moments

[scarletgray]

asagiri should release a whole volume on teen skk shenanigans

[altruistic-meme]

OMG!!!! GAJEHENDIJSN I’m like screaming at the wip!!!!! It sounds so good!!! I absolutely loved that you just ran with it.

And like of course you think about Chuuya. Who doesn’t? He’s great.

But a time swap?! With 16 year old Chuuya?!?!?!? genidbekdiensmsb. Brilliant. And specifically stormbringer Chuuya. Ahhhhhh my heart. You have lit so many things in my brain.

16 year old Chuuya who got thrown into the future fresh in his grief of the flags and surrounded my faces who are so similar to the ones he knows but just that much different to make it feel off. And like as of that moment Dazai is one of the only his friends (even if they won’t admit it) alive at the moment. And a Dazai that hasn’t solidified in his partner? before their name of Soukoku?!?! And if it’s safe to assume there will be some agency shenanigans, and agency that hasn’t seen Chuuya with confidence etched into his skin. They will be seeing a Chuuya before he became an executive, a Chuuya who just lost his family for the second time. People who were brutally murdered and Albatross who he held in his arms as he died. And this would be before he processed all this committed by someone who referred to themselves as Chuuya’s brother?!?! Someone who is grappling with their humanity and is still a 16 a child

And 22 Chuuya now faced with people of his past. People who haven’t grown yet Dazai who is a child and a Mori who is still new to the position and Kouyou who hasn’t fully became his sister (I’m speculating a little here/a little headcanon of mine) and Kouyou who is 20. A Kouyou who is know younger than him.

God the potential for angst here. But also the shenanigans that can come from this. Like imagine 22 Chuuya just treating 16 Dazai like the child he is. Like Chuuya is just amused by 16 Dazai. Imagine Chuuya just gives him head pats and completely dismisses the mysterious dangerous aura Dazai tries to portray. He’s just so tiny and like a wet cat.

Lmao I’m just having fun with this. Thank you for letting me ramble and I’m looking forward to whatever you come out with this.

chuuya is in my mind 24/7 right now it is a BLAST

anyway I AM SO GLAD YOU LIKE THE IDEA it is something i truly am hoping to do justice and just. AAAAAAAAAAA.

YES POOR BABY 16Y/O CHUUYA he is probably going to be having the WORST time in this fic i feel so bad bc he is going to be going through it!! fresh out of a fight where he just had so much turned upside down, fresh from his grief of the Flags, and thrown into the chaos without a moment to think. not to share spoilers >> but >> i mean who do we THINK is going to be going to get him when he first arrives in the future 😔 he is going to have to deal with a Dazai who knows more about him than he can even imagine.

and that's to say nothing of 22y/o Dazai himself, who will certainly be facing many dilemmas of his own!! oh i am so excited to play with his character and how he handles the whole situation. suddenly faced with a version of his partner pre-leaving the mafia, who doesn't know the history they have together, who is in the middle of some of the worst moments in his life and Dazai knows all of it. and, worst of all, who is questioning his humanity again!! and a Dazai who has a chance he couldn't take before-

and of course, 22y/o Chuuya facing down the worst moments in his life, now with the knowledge of what is coming, of things he could maybe prevent, but knowing that it's too late for some already. having to face a 16y/o Dazai again, a Dazai who he already trusts but who doesn't trust him quite yet. who doesn't know their history, doesn't know his own future, doesn't know where he'll end up one day. but who is a kid despite it all and Chuuya can appreciate that now in ways he couldn't have at 16. also Chuuya being able to gloat about being an executive to a Dazai who hasn't yet reached that point lmao he will absolutely take any ammunition he has now while he can.

but again, he is also facing Verlaine again, facing people he couldn't save the first time, and facing the question of if he can now, if he could change anything at all, and would he?

and 16y/o Dazai as well! who is now being faced with a Chuuya who is so much more mature, who is so much harder to rile up, and who is carrying weight that Dazai can't yet understand on his shoulders. a Chuuya who, for once, knows everything while Dazai is still trying to piece together the puzzle. and a Chuuya who is the only person to see Dazai for what he is- a child. and the only one to treat him that way. and he has no idea what to do with that, because what can he do?

and then, of course, there is Verlaine suddenly facing an older version of his brother, there is Adam who i am sure will be having the time of his life (<- he will be suffering), Shirase who is also suddenly faced with his friend's ex-friend's future, Detective Murase who will see the kid he was trying to protect grown up and alive despite his circumstances.......

and, of course! the agency facing such a young version of Chuuya, the shenanigans that they will try to pull with him lmao

so many variables so much to work through so much to consider

[i-eat-mold]

can we all remember for a moment that skk grew up together? aside from all the corny stuff, they little aku grew (well, not chuuya) next to each other. they met when they were 15. pretty much still a little kid. where are the VOICE CRACKS? they would laugh at each other so bad and then crack themselves. it would be terrible to try to be in a conversation with them because every time one of them gets a voice crack the other one would repeat the sound and laugh and then they would start throwing things at each other or something. don’t get me started on pimples. come on. you’re telling me these two kids exposed to all kinds of stress and weird things are gonna get through their teens with constant perfect skin? would they use pimple patches? dazai would get the star ones or some cutesy ladybug ones because why not. and chuuya would def have a skincare routine and dazai would make fun of him when he stayed at chuuyas place overnight. then he would have the hardest time asking if he could try it too because psaw that’s soooooo embarrassing.

i don’t know man. they’re silly teens. i think about them a lot

[whathorselegs]

If Not For You

Summary: A short two part fic of Dazai and Chuuya comforting each other through Dazai's unconventional expressions of emotion. Part 1 is teen!skk after the Dragon Head conflict. Part 2 is 22!skk Title taken from Maneskin's song 'If Not For You'

Pairing: Skk (Dazai x Chuuya) Can be read as a platonic or romantic.

Inspired by @unicornpopcorn14 's post about Dazai's unconventional shows of emotion

This was supposed to be silly but it ended up leaning way more into emotional hurt/comfort

Part One - If Not For You

Despite his small stature, Dazai had never found it difficult to locate Chuuya. If anything, it was harder not to notice him with all the noise he was usually making. Exclaiming at this, yelling about that, stomping about, sometimes- on the off chance Chuuya saw Dazai first- he’d still fling himself at Dazai with his gravity. Of course, that was usually when Dazai had played some prank or other and Chuuya was actively hunting him down.

Lately though, Chuuya had been disturbingly quieter, and just like Dazai was just about to now, he was increasingly finding Chuuya curled up in some secluded corner of an empty room, sulking.

No, not sulking, he reminded himself.

Mourning.

Again.

Dazai had never understood why people mourn the dead so intensely, sure, it was sad, but most things were. He thought it was the strangeness of having a person suddenly not be there at first, and that people in the mafia- who were used to losing people- would be just as unaffected as he was. Turns out, he was alone in that here too. Frequent exposure to death didn’t stop people mourning, it seemed. Especially not Chuuya. This was the second lot of friends he’d lost and whilst Dazai didn’t understand the reason behind people’s mourning, he had enough sense to show them a little more grace than he normally would.

So when he came across Chuuya, huddled up and alone in an abandoned meeting room for the third time this week, Dazai was also quiet. He could have yelled Chuuya’s name, made a joke about him hiding away like a mouse in the walls, something of their usual games, but they all just felt intensely wrong in this situation. As much as he would like to force their normal routines back into place, he knew that wouldn’t help.

He sat down on the floor beside Chuuya, who had his knees up to his chest, leaning against the wall and idly looking out the floor to ceiling windows. Though Dazai doubted he was actually taking anything of the scenery in.

“You’ll get a hunch if you keep sitting like that.” Dazai said, choosing a soft tone for the teasing, offering a branch for Chuuya to take if he wanted to reach out for normalcy. 

Instead Chuuya sucked in a short breath, tensing up, like he’d only just noticed Dazai and shot him an annoyed glare in warning.

No games then.

Dazai leaned back against the wall as he formulated his next move. He was supposed to be bringing Chuuya to a briefing, however, in the mood he’s in, Dazai didn’t fancy his chances trying to tell Chuuya to do anything. He needed to get him out of this funk first, clear his mind.

His head tilted to the side as he pondered whether it was possible to clear the mind of a skull that’s already empty. Any other situation and he would have said that out loud. Just right now, though, Dazai didn’t feel like getting pulverised. Trying to be sensitive to people's feelings was giving him a headache. He needed to relieve the tension building in his temples. Looking around, Dazai noticed this room had a sofa, perfect for curing his headache, but then he couldn’t just ignore Chuuya, still curled in on himself in the corner. That would make for a terrible sight.

And then it hit him, he could solve both problems at once.

“I know what you need.” Emboldened by his plan, Dazai went as far as to prod Chuuya’s side, earning him another glare. “You need to clear your head.”

After a moment of just staring sceptically at Dazai, Chuuya responded with a strain in his voice he couldn’t quite hide. “What?”

“Come on, I know a great method.” Not deterred by Chuuya’s lukewarm reaction Dazai grabbed the sleeve of Chuuya’s jacket and attempted to pull Chuuya up. The arm moved, but the rest of the boy remained sat where he was, like the immovable rock he was. 

“Why would I do anything you tell me to do?” Chuuya snapped, trying to yank his arm back and failing.

“Because, I’m right. Always. My methods have never failed us once. Ever.” He tugged at Chuuya’s arm as he spoke, seeing Chuuya subconsciously uncurling from his position, torn between ignoring Dazai and trying to shut him up. Dazai just had to toe the line between just annoying enough to motivate him to move and not enough to get his nose broken. 

Finally Chuuya stood up. “You smug little- You’re not always right.”

“Prove me wrong then.” Dazai dangled the opportunity in front of Chuuya, a bet was always a good motivator for him.

“Fine. Show me your dumb method and I will.”

He led them to the sofa, trying not to be too obvious about how pleased with himself he was. “This always clears my head.” Dazai informed Chuuya and he knelt on the sofa facing the backrest. When Chuuya didn’t do the same, he pointed next to him on the sofa. “Do as I do.” He barely managed to bite back the dog nickname.

Chuuya huffed, rolling his eyes before mimicking Dazai’s actions and mumbling something about how stupid this was under his breath. Instead of calling him out on it, Dazai let it slide and lowered himself backwards on the sofa, letting his legs hook over the backrest and his head dangle off the end of the sofa cushion. Chuuya looked at him like he’d just contorted himself into a pretzel rather than sat upside-down on a sofa, but he did follow Dazai’s actions.

“How is this suppose to-”

“Shush!” Dazai hushed him. “Just look out the window and be still.”

The familiar tingle of blood rushing to his face, the tickle of his hair slowly falling down and the dull pulse of his blood in his ears steadily began to build. Dazai felt his lips and fingertips turn numb as he watched the clouds pass outside the window and soon, there wasn’t a single thought in his head. No frustration, no confusion, no strange ache to somehow share in Chuuya’s pain, just the sound of his own heartbeat and both their gentle breaths. 

After a minute of quiet, he glanced Chuuya's way to find him staring out the window, face ridiculously red and expression almost blank. It may have actually looked blank to most, but Dazai had learned to see the subtle wonder with which Chuuya’s eyes saw the world. Wonder that those eye’s seemed to have been lacking recently. It made his all too loud heart flutter to see even the faintest hint of it’s return.

“See clear head.” He said quietly, or hoped it was quiet, hard to tell with all the blood in his head. “Bad thoughts are heavy.”

Chuuya only briefly met his gaze before looking out the window again with a deep, tired breath. “Yeah.”

“They fall right out your ears this way!”

At that Chuuya snorted, almost falling off the sofa.

Part Two - I Couldn't Get Off This Floor

Chuuya always locked his door. That simple fact was undeniable. His apartment contained too much sensitive information to be forgetting to lock his door. On the off-chance Chuuya thought he’d forgotten, he always turned around to double check and it was always locked. Which is why it was becoming an increasing annoyance to return home and find his door unlocked. Despite him having the only key.

Knowing the exact cause of this conundrum only aggravated Chuuya further. He hung up his coat and hat before removing his shoes and made his way into the front room ready to give said ‘cause’ a piece of his mind.

He halted immediately when he saw Dazai lying face down on the floor. Perhaps if this was any other person on the floor it might have been more alarming, but this wasn’t the first time Chuuya had witnessed Dazai in this state. Despite himself, Chuuya found his earlier annoyance melting away, his shoulders drooping as he took in the sight for a moment. Then he quietly made his way over to Dazai, grabbing a couple of cushions from the sofa as he got down on the floor with Dazai.

“Floor time, huh?” He said softly, poking Dazai’s shoulder. To which Dazai hummed in acknowledgement before turning his face in Chuuya’s direction. His forehead was marked by a shiny red square from where it had been pressed to the floor. Chuuya suppressed the desire to laugh at the sight and pushed one of the cushions Dazai’s way. It was accepted silently as Dazai tucked his forearms under it and rubbed his face against the soft fabric. No thanks, Chuuya noted, no words at all. So Dazai really was feeling off today.

Chuuya lay on his side, facing Dazai, resting his own cushion under his head. After watching Dazai a moment longer to see if he’d come out of his shell, Chuuya decided he was well and truly jammed in there. He reached out, pushing his hand under Dazai’s cushion to find the fingers hiding there and hooking them around his own.

“Have you eaten recently?” He asked.

There was a delay before Chuuya felt Dazai squeeze his fingers. Once for yes. 

“Promise?

Another single squeeze.

He couldn’t help the doubt in mind, Dazai was notorious for forgetting to feed himself when got like this, but Chuuya didn’t push it. He’d promised and doubting Dazai’s promises right now would only make him feel worse.

“Want to move to the bed?”

Two squeezes. Which meant no. 

More accurately this meant Dazai felt like he couldn’t move yet, he’d described it like the feeling of being trapped behind his eyes once, like his own body no longer obeyed him because of the sheer exhaustion that overcame it. So Chuuya wouldn’t pester him to move before he was ready.

“What about some music?”

One squeeze, yes.

“Blanket?”

One squeeze, yes.

“Contact?”

Two squeezes, no.

There was never a set rule as to what exactly helped Dazai in these situations, Chuuya simply memorised which suggestions most often helped. Music to quiet the thoughts, blankets for comfort and occasionally, physical contact like brushing his hair helped. The last one was the least likely for Dazai to say yes to, but in recent months there had been an uptick in yeses, so Chuuya always offered.

He stood up again and set about completing his tasks. He chose a soft classical CD to play, one he imagined Iceman would have enjoyed listening to. No words, the perfect selection of songs to just rest your mind to. Then grabbed a blanket from the bedroom and returned to Dazai, draping the blanket over him and lying back down at his side. Even if Dazai didn’t want physical contact, having someone’s presence beside him, not judging or trying to force him to move, just understanding and being still with him helped.

Chuuya closed his eyes, letting his own mind settle as he listened to the gentle music. Honestly, he knew he shouldn’t, but his work day had been so long, he could have fallen asleep right there.

A hand found his own again and when re-opened his eyes, he found Dazai watching him with his hand loosely wrapped around Chuuya’s. Dazai’s index finger tapped at Chuuya’s knuckle. Morse code he realised.

Thank you.

“Sure thing, partner.”

[hibiscesque]

// A short ficlet with some thoughts abt SKK & dreams (or lack thereof); CW for hand-wavey trauma mentions.

After the tenth time Dazai revs up the volume to blast Crazy Frog on his headphones after Chuuya had—way more patiently than he should have, by the way—requested that he turn it the fuck down, Chuuya is done.

They say it's better to ask for forgiveness than permission, an adage that leaves him genuinely contemplating the merits of breaking Dazai's bones in alphabetical order now and apologizing to Mori-san for murdering his executive in cold blood later for a few moments. Luckily for Dazai, Chuuya is both an incredibly magnanimous partner and a little bit terrified of Mori-san when he's angry, so he settles for storming over to the other bed, ripping the headphones from Dazai's ears, and summarily snapping the cord over his knee.

Dazai, for his part, seems enragingly nonplussed by the turn of events.

"You're paying for that," he chirps, tossing the cord over into the trash and pulling out his handheld to start again on that dumb 1v1 he was playing through the entire meeting with their contact earlier today.

"God," Chuuya rages as the telltale automated beeping and imitation punching noises begin echoing through the room, "don't you ever sleep?"

"Nope!" Dazai informs him cheerfully, popping the P.

Chuuya breathes in. He breathes out. He tries not to burst every blood vessel in his brain out of sheer doneness with the disruptive, obnoxious, and downright diabolical creature who he has the misfortune to call a partner.

"We've been on this job for three days now," Chuuya points out, trying so hard to keep his voice even. "And you haven't so much as closed your eyes for more than ten seconds at a goddamn time."

Dazai raises an eyebrow at him as if he's just asked him to discuss the relative merits of licking up Vaseline like it's frosting.

"Yes," he says, like his actions over the last few days are perfectly reasonable and Chuuya is the crazy one. "Do you have a point?"

"You need sleep!" Chuuya snaps. "I'm not your freaking mother, I shouldn't have to tell you this!"

The other eyebrow artfully ascends to meet the first. "And you, former king of a gang of orphans and runaways from the slums, are telling me this because you're some kind of expert in what mothers tell their children."

Chuuya splutters, red hot piping rage squishing his heart like silly putty and shooting nitrified sriracha up his veins. "For the last time, I wasn't their ki—oh, FUCK you!"

"Sorry, not interested," Dazai trills, clearly only half paying attention to the conversation at this point as he mashes his fingers into his controller buttons.

"You know that wasn't what I—you know what? Nevermind. I don't even know why I try with you." Chuuya huffs and throws himself back against the bed, mashing a pillow into his face and letting out a groan so heavy-hitting it's almost a scream.

"I'm a saint," he muses, though the only response Dazai gives to that is the continual fighting noises from his game. "I'm a motherfucking saint."

He lets his breaths come in and out in a meditative pattern for a few minutes, trying to ease his nerves and burning rage for despicable mackerels enough to drift back into another couple of hours of uneasy sleep before rendezvous tomorrow. Infuriating beeping aside, he's almost managed it when a series of expletives hits the air in artful semantic form.

"Dammit!"

Chuuya turns just on time to see Dazai chuck his gaming machine to the side and groan a groan of the weary wicked.

"I'm going to regret asking this, but what?" Chuuya prods.

"My Nintendo died," Dazai mourns, starfishing across his bed—being the gangly sonuvabitch he is, all four of his limbs stick off the bed like candles out the sides of a cake.

"Good," Chuuya grumbles. "Now maybe you'll finally go to sleep."

He starts to roll over to try and catch whatever ZZZs are still possible at this point, but an even louder ruckus than before makes itself known on Dazai's side of the room and Chuuya hears his socked feet begin to pad toward the door.

"What is it now?" Chuuya demands.

"I'm going for a walk."

Chuuya thinks it is quite magnanimous of him not to scream like a banshee and tackle Dazai American football-style upon the registration of those words.

"It's three in the morning," Chuuya points out incredulously.

Kouyou had told him once that the most important part of keeping control of an argument is to make sure you remain calm. To make her point, she'd showed him some not-so-friendly repartee between two billionaire tech moguls—Bill Gates and the late Steve Jobs. As Jobs grew angrier and angrier through the course of their conversation, Gates remained calm, level, composed. By the end Jobs was all but screaming, sweating buckets and face ripe as a tomato, while Gates looked just about like he was out on a casual stroll smelling the roses.

"Who do you think won that argument?" she'd asked.

Chuuya had gotten the point.

He tries to remind himself of Kouyou's words now. Calm on top, he repeats to himself. Calm on top, calm on goddamn top.

"Just going to stretch my legs," Dazai titters a little too casually.

Fuck it.

"What the hell is up with you?" Chuuya demands, fists clenched as he shoots up in bed to bear his teeth at Dazai. "Why are you so fricking averse to sleeping, of all things? I know you think you're further along the evolutionary chain than the rest of us, but you still need to rest, you dolt!"

When he catches Dazai's gaze he is not expecting what he sees at all. Dazai has gone so stricken he's all but ossified, staring at Chuuya with an indescribable war in his burning dark eyes.

There is silence, for several moments, so loaded that Chuuya almost regrets his words. But then...

"What do you dream about?" Dazai blurts out.

Chuuya is so struck dumb by his question that his fists uncurl and his mouth drops open, a little.

"What?"

"Nevermind." Dazai huffs. "I'm gonna go on that walk." He begins to turn toward the door, but as Chuuya comes to himself a bit, he realizes he can't let that happen.

He's not—he's not stupid, you know, no matter what Dazai says. He knows why Dazai wants to know.

Very few people know— knew, in the Flags' cases—about Chuuya's little dream secret. And Dazai is, quintessentially, exactly the kind of person Chuuya would never want to let it slip to on both a personal and theoretical level. But whatever haunts Dazai at night is apparently horrid enough that he's pulled three all-nighters to avoid it, and that... doesn't sit right with Chuuya. If a moment of vulnerability, though Dazai's surely going to use it against him later, would be valuable to him in some way, make him feel better—or whatever the equivalent of feeling better is for a miserable creature like Dazai—Chuuya would be an asshole not to give it to him.

"I don't dream," Chuuya blurts out. 

When he's met only with silence, his lungs grow desperately uncomfortable in his chest, almost like his ribcage has grown a size too small. A little heady on the feeling, thirsty to stop it, he continues to run his mouth.

"I think it's… a side effect of whatever they did to me in the lab. I can't remember having a single dream, ever, in what I can remember of my life. Not while I was with the Sheep, and not now with the Port Mafia either. Not even after the whole N stuff. I thought—" 

Chuuya chuckles, and it feels more like an ache than amusement.

"I thought maybe all that electricity would have knocked something loose, but it didn't."

He looks down. Laugh-wheeze-chokes. "I shoulda been the one with an ability called No Longer Human, I guess. What kind of person doesn't even dream? Heh. Those, those sixty seconds you gave me, with Guivre. My choice. It wasn't me being selfless. I just already knew the answer. So yeah. Now you know. Make fun of me or whatever. I can take it."

He scrunches his eyes shut, preparing for the worst, because honestly, despite what he said, he's not sure if he can actually take being called inhuman by someone who somehow, despite being the least human person Chuuya knows, is also the most human person Chuuya has ever known. It would feel like a death knell, or something. The fall of a guillotine blade. The first shovelful of dirt tossed onto a coffin.

He'd told himself, when Mori had told him that story about the lead, when he'd driven by his parents' house, after everything with Verlaine, that he didn't need that answer either way. Because whether he was human or not, the Chuuya he was before the lab was dead. Because he's learned that there's more to being human than having once been a zygote. There's no one that's better proof of that than the people he's met while he's in the mafia.

But hearing that he's nothing but whatever whatsit lines of code from whip smart, fierce, brave, angry, apathetic, cruel, kind, hungry, unsatiable, childish, thousand-year-old Dazai would kill him, he thinks.

"No," Dazai says, right when Chuuya is about to implode with anticipation, and though Chuuya doesn't quite understand what he's talking about, he's surprised by the intensity. The lack of caustic mockery in his voice.

"'No' what?"

"You're so stupid," Dazai informs him.

Chuuya's eyebrows scrunch. "That is… not the reaction I was expecting."

"Dreams aren't what make us human," Dazai informs him, bowling over his words as if he hasn't spoken at all. "Dreams are just your subconscious' license to make you process your life in the cruelest and most awful way possible. Chuuya probably doesn't dream because he's so straightforward that he scares rulers. I promise you you're not missing out on—on humanity because you don't."

Chuuya stares. And stares. And stares some more.

Dazai scoffs. "Doesn't think he's human. I promise you if someone was gonna make a human they'd make sure to make them smarter than you. Your clone probably had double the IQ points."

"Fuck off," Chuuya snaps immediately, but maybe his chest is a little warm. Perhaps.

Then, because maybe he's also a little bit sadomasochistic, "What do you dream about anyway, Dazai?"

That gets the bastard. Dazai goes absolutely still.

"Come on." Chuuya scoffs. "You're not telling me that you're not going to spill the deets after making me pour my heart out. And don't tell me some shit like 'I dream about my perfect suicide' or 'I dream about you slipping on a banana peel and snapping your neck like a cheap pencil', because I'll actually strangle you if you do."

"Kinky," Dazai says, but his heart clearly isn't in it. He lets out a scoff of his own, rolling not just his eyes but his whole head until his neck pops with a snap. "Fine. I'll 'spill the deets', as you say." He plants himself crisscross applesauce on the floor like the obnoxious leech he is.

"I dream about things from my past."

Chuuya waits for him to go on, but he is only met by the sound of first crickets and then the world's tiniest violin.

"I kinda figured that," Chuuya points out dully. "Care to share any more?"

Dazai scoffs again, wetting his lips with his tongue carefully as he challengingly meets Chuuya's eyes.

"If it so pleases his highness. There are lots of things, but mostly it's about thieves."

Chuuya raises an eyebrow. "Thieves?" he prods.

It seems whatever Dazai is about to say causes even his spite to not be enough to give him the wherewithal to continue looking at Chuuya. "Yes. People taking something from me that I don't want to give. There. The end. Can I go on my walk now?"

Oh. Oh.

There are attoseconds in the back of Chuuya's mind where he tries to convince himself that he's misinterpreting, reading too much into those words, but the part of him who's known Dazai long enough to know that he would never let an implication like that into his words if he didn't mean it, if only because he believed it would make him look weak, knows he's not.

Chuuya desperately steadies his face so Dazai doesn't see it cracking in the way it so badly wants to. 

He, he wants to be sick, he wants to punch a wall, he wants to—something. He doesn't know. He's always been an action, action, action guy, but for the first time since he can remember—since ever, maybe—he doesn't know.

Chuuya's met dozens of people with stories like that, in the Sheep and later, his dear late friend Lippmann, even, but Dazai was somehow the last person he'd ever expect to have something like that in their past.

"A fly just flew in your mouth," Dazai informs Chuuya.

Stopping himself from shrieking is a near miss. "Wha—whaaah?" He begins hacking and coughing, trying to spit it out. "EGH! Da'ai, Da'ai is ih gahe? 'I 'ou 'ee i' 'eae?"

It's only when he hears the first pitchy giggle that he realizes what's happened. 

"You asshole," Chuuya says in realization, so shocked it's almost reverent. He glowers. "You know, normally when people want people to stop gaping they say, 'Close your mouth; you'll catch flies.' They don't tell someone that there is a fly in their mouth!"

"Love you too," Dazai enthuses, causing Chuuya to devolve into another round of spluttering. By the time he's remembered what they were talking about moments ago, he's gotten enough distance from the immediate emotional overwhelm of Dazai's confession to remember that this is Dazai and pigs would fly before sympathy would be allowed on the table in their relationship.

"Yeah, whatever," Chuuya mutters, rolling his eyes. "Gonna regret asking this in about two minutes, but room for another person on your walk?"

Shocking Dazai twice in one night should entitle Chuuya to some kind of trophy, he thinks.

"You're not going to try and make me go to bed?"

"Hey, hey, don't get me wrong," Chuuya insists quickly. "Tomorrow you're not getting a fucking option. But I'm tired enough that I pity your dumb ass right now and I'm not gonna make you tonight. Look—" Chuuya hesitates, wondering exactly how to word this. "—I wouldn't want to sleep if that was what I was dreaming about either, OK? So this is your one-time get out of jail free card for basic human bodily functions."

When Dazai doesn't respond right away, Chuuya feels anxiety begin to stir up in his gut, wondering if he's said something wrong.

"You good, bastard?" he asks cautiously.

"Yep!" Dazai chirps cheerfully. "Just trying to figure out a way I can make you regret asking to come with me in less than two minutes. Chip, chip, cheerio, let's go, puppy-o!"

"Go die in a hole," Chuuya snaps, but maybe he's smiling a little.

[reading-stains]

hello!!do you have skk fic recs?

Introduction

Yes, I do. I’m sorry it took so long to give you a reply, but I wanted to give you a comprehensive list and was busy preparing for my last day in high school, and then I got a job 12 hours later, and then I traveled to New York for a couple Broadway workshops. But now that today’s been dealt with, I have my wonderful notes.

So here’s the gist of it. I have three focused reviews on some of my favorite Soukoku fanfics ever, but I felt like copy pasting it would kill you a little, so I’m going to use a simplified format that echoes what I once did for two other ships years ago.

Canon Space

Here I compiled four fanfics that take place in main canon spaces (so not BEAST). While I encourage you to read, I also ask you to make sure to check the tags of the actual work for any possible triggers. Furthermore, the styles these characters are written in, and the way they are portrayed, vary from writer to writer. Some are more “canon” based than others, but they all carry the essence of this ship. And if they don’t in your eyes, then you’re just reading a great novel with Japanese names. 

i'll bleed out for you by StarshipDancer

Synopsis: After getting impaled together, basically dying in each others arms in a joint mission with the Port Mafia and the ADA, and getting brought back by Yosano, this shattered Soukoku is asked to go into hiding. In this time, things seem to start healing. But the impending call asking them to return to their positions in their groups haunts them, and when it arrives, things fall apart all over again.  

Tags: Caretaking, PTSD, A Singularly Important Rat Is Present, Canon-Divergence, Post-Port Mafia Days, Love Confession, Pet Co-Parenting, Angst

Word Count: 71,848

Notes: Rattata is the best character. I remember reading this fanfic between the airport and my flight, and when chapter four ended, I had to board the plane, with my shaking hands and quiet sniffles. Please read this one.

If you kiss me (I might let it happen) by encsiimomo

Synopsis: Chuuya’s done watching this. Dazai’s literally dating a new girl every week. He dates based on who asks him first that Monday, he breaks up with them that Sunday, and it goes on again. And again. And again. It’s driving him insane. So he does the only thing he can think of to earn himself a break – He asks to date him for that week’s cycle. Dazai’s surprised. Chuuya’s exhausted. But once the sparks fly, they’re unable to be put out. 

Tags: Canon Divergent & Kind of Canon Compliant, Dark Era, Smut, Mutual Pining, Light Angst, Silly

Word Count: 52,127

Notes: I loved this fic because it encapsulates a pretty carefree tone that isn’t associated with Dark Era. It’s pretty smutty, but it’s really lovely to read them. It’s not a reflection of what these characters canonically represent. And while it definitely stays as a loose interpretation of these characters, it keeps the essence that makes this ship so sharp and wonderful. I loved Oda’s appearances too, they made me laugh.

A Doll's House by Abyss_In_WonderLand_likes_sexy_cannibals

Summary: After coming to contact with an ability-powered artifact, Dazai and Chuuya are forced to work together to overcome the ability’s trials, and face the bubbling sentiments they keep trying so hard to ignore. 

Tags: Teamwork, Ability Loss, Poisoning, Denial of Feelings, Confessions, Light Angst

Word Count: 45,288

Notes: While definitely not a character study, this fic goes and shows how wonderfully warm a Double Black fanfic can be. You’ll giggle in some moments, be entranced in others, and it’s just fun. This is for those that aren’t scouring for the angst. This was the first fic that sunk me into a skk fanfiction hunt all throughout the winter holidays.

On Deathless Feet by AbsoluteNegation

Synopsis: Chuuya always knows the monster can get out of control, but it doesn’t get any less surprising when Arahabaki powers through him. For a while though, it’d been comforting to know Dazai could always reign it in, make it go quiet. Because he did when they recently met, when they rose through the ranks, and at the brink of their end. But after years of disconnection, and the consistent waves of betrayal, is Chuuya capable of trusting him? And is Dazai capable of letting him?

Tags: Caretaking, Controlling Arahabaki, Port Mafia, Post-Port Mafia, Mistrust, Non-Linear Storytelling

Word Count: 71,848

Notes: This story is just breathtaking. The writing style is incredibly vast and detailed, which may seem scary when described, but it flows so easily when you read it. You cannot negate AbsoluteNegation’s incredible skill. The story takes place in an event where Chuuya loses control of Arahabaki in a  Post-Port Mafia Soukoku time. But because of its non-linear style, one gets to understand their past experiences with each other in a manner that contextualizes and weighs in the events of their reunion. 

Fanon Spaces

Before I begin, I’d like to note that there are so many AUs in this fandom, that I had to really search for the canon ones in my list. So understand that if you want more of these, I DEFINITELY have more of these. Also, again, while I encourage you to read, I also ask you to make sure to check the tags of the actual work for any possible triggers. 

I’ll crown your inner child with laurel by acuteguwu

Synopsis: Chuuya has worked in a Michelin Star restaurant. So he really has no place in losing this cooking competition. But a sudden newcomer, who seemingly has no previous experience in the field, seems to want to tell him his bechamel sauce isn’t ready. And really, who does he think he is?

Tags: Chef Competition AU, Character Study, Slow Burn, Chuuya Is A Blunt Perfectionist, Dazai Is A Culinary Genius

Words: 197,090

Notes: I read this in two days, and I finished by waking up at four in the morning to finish up before going to a drag queen brunch. So really, my experience was incredible. You get to really know these characters, who are very themselves, and it’s lovely. Please read, it’s so worth it.

music for our funeral by itotypes

Synopsis: Dazai has always been lost on what exactly he wants to be. Chuuya knows exactly what he wants. Working with such incredible differences proves to be a difficult challenge, ending in at least a little bit of violence multiple times, but they make it work. Because their music sounds beautiful. Because they’re better geniuses beside the other. And maybe because once it started, they can’t seem to process this journey can ever end.

Tags: No Smut, Angst, 70s, Musicians!AU, Drug Abuse, References to Child Neglect, Lowkey Pretty Violent, Emotional Cheating (w/ Main Ship)

Word Count: 67,723

Notes: Look, there’s a whole genre of Soukoku music AUs. And I could tell you to read the famous “still, still, still” by icedlightroast, or the even more famous “I Was Screaming Your Name Through The Radio” by ElectricSplatter. Which really, they’re both INCREDIBLE fics that I think you should read (IWSYNTTR literally inspired me to try and write music, which led me to do an album for a school project, so I’m not kidding when I say they’re life changing), but I also know that these are famous fanfics that you can find in almost any big skk reader thread. So disregarding the following recommendation, I try to give you fanfics I found through a long scrolling process. 

Everything or Nothing by Wellthathappened (Cataclysmic_Calamity)

Synopsis: Chuuya has never been able to experience much. So when he meets Dazai on the night of orientation, he lets himself explore. So as lips sink into his, and as he lets himself be free, Dazai lets him know how unimportant he is by walking away when kids walk in on them. Cut to a month later, they’re paired as roommates, Chuuya’s gotten what Dazai insists is a douchey boyfriend, and Dazai Osamu has to recognize it wasn’t true. It wasn’t a night’s fluke. He really, definitely isn’t straight.

Tags: College AU, Pinning, Chronic Illness, Creation & References Of Illegal Panini Rings,  Confessions, Miscommunication, Past Sexual Abuse, Bad Parenting, Cute Dates, Dazai’s Really Rich

Word Count: 264,937

Notes: I recognize I just put in my notes that there’s no major point in recommending these big fanfics, but I just read this because the person that introduced me into the fandom in the first place really loves this one. And it’s incredible. Worth every moment. I laughed a lot, and cried a lot. It’s those pieces of work that resound with you that keep you engaged. This one builds off of that.

Inseparable by milwritescausewhynot

Synopsis: Dazai and Chuuya have been joined to the hip since day one. But they’re not best friends. Or enemies. Or, worst of all, lovers. They are, however, great at pranking each other. Until one goes close to dangerous, and things begin getting complicated afterwards. 

Tags: High School AU, Pranks, Light Angst, Denial, Pining, Confessions, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Crazy Kouyou, Childhood Friends, No Smut

Word Count: 107,804

Notes: I hadn’t saved this one in my compilation, but I couldn’t not find it. This fic is so charming, and I most enjoy how the characters move through the story. You can feel the way they're in-tuned from the get go. Definitely recommend.

In Conclusion

Again, I’m sorry for such a late response. I’m literally falling asleep right now but I felt too guilty leaving this for tomorrow morning. If you have any questions, notes, or looking for something specific for your reading, we can talk about it. 

Anyways, thanks for asking! Hope you love them, and sorry for any mistakes

[great-master-airplane]

if you're still accepting prompts for the kiss meme... 19 for skk?? (ps you are my favorite skk fic writer & im always so inspired by your writing. TYSM <3)

if i could request another it would be 4 for skk but i don't want to be greedy

Aaaahhhh thank you!!! I'm honored you think so highly of my work <3333 I did end up finding a way to make both prompts work, so I hope you enjoy~

4. A Kiss Given to the Wrong Person

19. A Kiss on the Nose

“Chuuya~!”

At the sound of his own voice, Dazai winced. He’d been quiet for so long that he’d forgotten just how amplified the world was. Even the familiar taunt bounced against his skull the same way it did the halls of the apartment, a useless echo that only made his head throb, and part of him wished he hadn’t opened his mouth at all.

The other part of him wanted to be spoiled, even at the risk of worsening his headache. Shouldn’t Chuuya be here to take care of him when he needed it most? How could the cruel chibi leave him alone in this moment of sheer agony?

“The hell do you want?” came the soft grumble from somewhere near the doorway. Dazai didn’t open his mind to look, but he was sure the sound had come from somewhere near the floor. He angled his head to adjust for Chuuya’s height and pouted.

“I’ve been abandoned,” he proclaimed to the ground, and he swore he could feel Chuuya seething from the other side of the room. How delightful. Dazai wished his head didn’t feel like it might explode so that he could enjoy Chuuya’s unusually quiet fury.

“I didn’t abandon you, dumbass,” Chuuya pointed out as he stalked closer, silent as a predator but still so loud. Everything about Chuuya was loud, and Dazai usually found comfort in that. Today, such noise made his vision swim behind his eyelids, and he wondered how angry Chuuya would be if he threw up on his golden retriever slippers.

Dazai bought the ugly things; surely that meant he could ruin them as he saw fit.

A hand found his, the smooth leather of his gloves a little cold against Dazai’s skin. He almost wished that Chuuya would’ve put that hand on his forehead instead, if only to offer a tiny bit of relief in this trying time, but he would settle for what he could get. If Chuuya had come close, then Dazai could only assume that his silly slug of a partner had realized that his plan to leave Dazai alone had failed spectacularly.

Chuuya’s own fault, really. He should’ve known better.

“You’re supposed to be taking a nap.”

“I was lonely. It’s too quiet.” Dazai tugged at Chuuya’s hand, a silent plea to join him in bed.

A plea that Chuuya blatantly ignored. “You have a headache, shitty Osamu. It’s supposed to be quiet so the damn thing will go away.”

Dazai hummed, unable to argue with such dazzling logic. “True. Everything’s so loud now that Chuuya’s here. I might throw up.”

“If you throw up on my slippers, you’re dead.”

Dazai smiled. He gave another halfhearted tug, but Chuuya still refused to move for him. “How cruel. Does Chuuya love his stupid doggy slippers more than he loves me?”

“’Course I do. My slippers are cute.”

Dazai sighed, dismayed, and finally let their hands drop to the bed. “I married the most awful slug. Doesn’t even love me more than his ugly slippers.”

“I don’t remember marrying such a whiny bitch.”

Dazai cracked an eye open to regard his husband. The curtains had been drawn to block out as much light as possible, but Dazai could still make out Chuuya’s furrowed brow and worried frown before his vision swam too much to keep looking. With a heavy sigh, he closed his eye again and nestled his cheek against the pillow.

“What a shame that Chuuya’s memory is already failing him. Such is the fate of a slug’s brain, I suppose.”

“Don’t make me kick your ass when you’re like this. You’re already pathetic enough.” With a huff, Chuuya sat down on the bed. Finally, a tiny victory! Dazai only needed to get the chibi to join him for a nap, and then he could sleep in peace. “There a reason why you don’t want to sleep? It’ll help with the headache, dumbass.”

Dazai wanted to hum again, but that seemed like a bad idea this time. He made a tiny noise instead. “It’s too quiet.”

“That’s the point.”

“I can’t sleep without Chuuya’s noise.” The confession fell from his lips easily, drawn out of him by this temporary weakness. Usually, he loathed such displays of vulnerability, even in the comfort of his husband’s company, but he knew when the situation called for it.

And the tactic worked like a charm. Dazai could hear the sharp breath that Chuuya took, feel the way his fingers tightened around Dazai’s. He imagined that Chuuya’s striking gaze had widened at first, their caramel shade brilliant even in such darkness, but now they softened in time with the quiet sigh of defeat he breathed into the room.

“... You’re a fucking idiot,” Chuuya muttered as he stood up, slipping away from Dazai so that he could take off his slippers and discard his gloves. The bed dipped, and then Chuuya’s arms appeared around him, drawing him close so carefully that Dazai feared he might break from Chuuya’s awful gentleness.

This migraine hadn’t changed him, hadn’t turned him into glass, and yet Chuuya hadn’t gotten the memo. Dazai’s temple throbbed, either from so much movement or from the terrible reminder that his husband cared so much for him, and he almost wished he would break. He wished that Chuuya would gather him up so gently that it would simply shatter him.

… At least that would take care of this persistent headache.

“This okay?” Chuuya asked once he’d settled.

“Hmm. Chuuya could give me a kiss now.”

“Greedy bastard.” But he still felt Chuuya move forward to fulfill his wish of a kiss—

—on the nose.

He kissed Dazai’s nose instead of his mouth. What a wretch.

“Chuuya missed.”

“Nope.” Dazai could just hear that ridiculous smirk in Chuuya’s voice. “I told you, didn’t I? I’ll give my husband a kiss once he stops being such a whiny bitch and takes a nap like he’s supposed to.”

Dazai was sure he could come up with an easy way to get Chuuya to still kiss him, but his head still hurt too much to consider such grand schemes. So he blurted out the only thing he could think of and hoped that it would work.

“I’ll give it to him.”

“... Hah?”

“Your husband. Kiss me, and I’ll give it to him.” Yeah. Yeah, that made sense. There was no way that Chuuya would be able to argue with such remarkable logic. Even with such a vicious headache, Dazai’s superior intellect would not be silenced. He would outsmart his chibi husband, and he would get his kiss!

A quiet chuckle blanketed the space between them, one that weaved its way into Dazai’s lungs and eased the tension from his veins. When Chuuya spoke again, he sounded so in love that it made Dazai feel even more nauseated than before.

“You’re such an annoying piece of shit. All right, you can have your damn kiss before you give me a headache.”

Dazai lifted his head, searching blindly for Chuuya’s mouth to keep him from saying something else that might make Dazai’s migraine worse. Chuuya met him halfway, his lips unbearably soft as they pressed against Dazai’s. The kiss was simple, sweet. Horribly domestic. A kiss to break him, to shatter him, and to put him back together again shard by wretched shard.

Only once he felt whole again did Dazai let the kiss end. He couldn’t tell how long had passed, if they’d kissed for a lifetime or just a couple of seconds, but he did know that his headache still persisted.

Hm… perhaps a nap wasn’t such a bad idea after all. Eyes still shut, Dazai burrowed close to his husband and let himself fall asleep to the comforting melody of Chuuya’s noise.

[wildflowerteas]

do you have any bsd fic recommendations ive reread your works 39299292 times i need sometjing new 😭

RE-READING MY STUFF IS CRAZY WHAT THE HELL . . . THANK YOU SO MUCH I'M SO GLAD I COULD CREATE SOMETHING YOU COULD GO BACK TO THAT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME YOU HAVE NO IDEA.

oh gosh, fic recommendations. let me pour myself a cup of tea and ponder.

I'll call your name by caramelt - comfort fic, sskk sillies, i go back to this one time and time again.

for a little while by ninanna - also sskk, pre-relationship ( also. tea. what is wrong with me oh my god ), the kind of fic I read while clutching a pillow and lying on my side in bed.

where your loyalties lie by writingfromtheshadows - Yakuza AU. to me, one of the best skk fics out there. impressive attention to detail ( especially with regard to the original characters ), amazing action, and excellent pacing. I think it's been almost six years now, but it just gets better with age. the ending is incredibly satisfying. - writer's envy

i feel obligated to include the bsd fandom classic that is

I was screaming your name through the radio by electricsplatter - teen soukoku in this one has my entire heart. their shenanigans, heavier moments, and the construction of the AU are so good.

Take your heart by riley_writes - phantom thief dazai / detective chuuya AU - comfort fic, writer's envy, a mystery that kept me on my toes, and skk banter that kept me smiling the whole way through.

and last but most certainly not least, I love everything I've ever read by halfbloom.

not a super long list. these are just some of the ones I've got from off the top of my head, and unfortunately, most of the fic I read is not BSD-related ( I'm neck-deep in Star Wars fic at all times. there's DUNE wips and clone-wars fix-it in my writing-dump-google-doc too. it's a disease. )

I'm actively trying to get out there and read more stuff in between writing my own, especially since I've met so many amazing writers since becoming more active in the fandom.

just, before i end this. thank you so much. i truly never fathomed someone re-reading/revisiting my works ( especially WIA which makes my tummy hurt just thinking abt it ) so this is just absolutely insane to me.

i hope you enjoy the ones listed here. they deserve SO much love.

[asoundofdrop]

Closer

A/N: Uhhh... if you happen to enjoy, thank you adfjjfd CW: unprotected sex, penis haver, vagina haver, established skk

If he had been asked back then, Camu would never have imagined being in this kind of moment with anyone. To be so excited, so content that his heart—artificial as it may be now—would be torn between resting or pacing this hard in his chest. To have a special someone to keep in that heart… someone to lavish him with special affections like this…

Ridiculous, Camu thought.

He huffed and closed his eyes as Hamea pressed another fluttering kiss, just below his jaw. It really was ridiculous, he thought, to be getting so embarrassed. His mouth was getting twisted into something of a scowl. It was far from their first time and yet, he still wasn’t sure how to act whenever she did these things so gently to him.

He once grumbled about this aloud to her. She smiled and said to him, “If you don’t know how to return it… then I’ll simply have to give extra for the both of us until we figure something out.”

Either way, he would never ask her to stop just because he looked stupid in the moment.

He opened his eyes again.

Pale moonlight spilled from the window and bathed the room so beautifully—a word that he rarely used. But with it, everything about Hamea seemed to glimmer so much more. Camu loved the way that she looked at him with pure adoration, especially right now. If he wasn’t preoccupied with her eyes, then he would have otherwise been distracted by how the moonlight dipped and shone over her body.

At the same time, he was keenly aware of how she traced her fingertips along his skin. Up his back, to his biceps, to his shoulders… as if she wanted to memorize everything about him, until they reached his face where they lingered.

She always liked holding his face between her hands. Camu would call it a strange fascination if he didn’t share the sentiment himself.

To spend the rest of his life like this… with her…

Camu was certain that he could forget the coldness of this world. It would all melt away with her gentle warmth. How did she describe it before whenever he held her…? Like snow welcoming spring, or something like that.

His mind was growing rather fuzzy.

Hamea quietly hummed and whispered, “Camu… you really are too good to me.”

She spoke delicately, as if she would have broken him by accident like glass had she spoken any louder.

Camu accepted another light kiss. He mumbled against her pretty lips, “Shouldn’t I be the one to say that?”

“Hee-hee… but you spoil me more than you think you do. Like right now. Letting me be in your arms, and letting me love you… I couldn’t ask for anything more.”

“You’re a weird one. Only you would say that sort of silly thing to me.”

“I mean it though.”

“…Yeah,” Camu agreed, fully assured. “You would never lie to me.”

As he continued to admire her, he reached up to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear. He looked at the scar along her forehead and began to reflect without realizing it.

According to the doctor on Hamea’s squad, she had to do emergency surgery on the Commandant while they were still stranded on Earth. This one did not heal particularly well, it seemed, just barely doing its job.

On Hamea’s neck, there was a faint cut. She once told him that she had gotten this particular scar a long time ago, before she had become a commandant. She suspected that it came from some sort of confrontation with kidnappers, but she couldn’t remember the exact details—nor would anyone tell her.

He then trailed downwards to her chest, to a scar he was more familiar with. At that time, they had just met. And yet, Camu’s legs were spurred on and he tried to run to her side as fast as he could. He was too late though, and she had all-but flatlined because of the creepy Ascendant. He still remembered what she said to him after the whole ordeal because of how odd he found it.

“That is simply Camu’s form of kindness. I think… you should give yourself a little more credit.”

Who knows if those were the words that pushed him to join Babylonia’s side, to join the Strike Hawks… Even he hadn’t come to a conclusion on that himself.

Lower on her body, near her abdomen, were two overlapping scars. He was unfamiliar with the newer one—the one given to her by that disgusting spider-looking Corrupted. But with how big it was and still delicate from having just healed, it unnerved him. Terribly so.

Just underneath it was a smaller, distinct scar that left him unnerved too. It was left behind when Hamea was ambushed by a Corrupted while she was still recovering from a flash grenade. It was perhaps the first time Camu had witnessed her so afraid that even her MIND beacon became unsteady. He remembered carrying her out of the building as she came close to bleeding out.

All of these times…

“Camu?” Hamea called, gently pulling him from his thoughts. “What’s wrong? Is something bothering you?”

He didn’t answer right away.

“Just thinking about the amount of sheer dumb luck that you have,” he grumbled.

He tightened his arms around her waist, holding her even closer than he already was. He didn’t intend on dwelling on something like this during their rare moment of intimacy. Hamea’s fragility as a human would always weigh heavy on his mind whether he liked it or not.

“I know,” she admitted. “But at least I’m still here, as unsightly as these marks may be…”

Camu saw how she shyly turned her face away.

Starting with the scar on her forehead, he pressed a gentle kiss to each one until he reached the one on her chest. Although he couldn’t quite duck his head low enough to reach the two on her abdomen, he carefully ran his thumb over them, as if to memorize the shape of it.

It gave him comfort when she would do that for him, and he could only hope it did the same for her. He repeated the process a few more times until his worries were assuaged by the smile returning to her face.

“Unsightly or whatever, it doesn’t make a difference to me. My choice is that I would take everything that you would give to me… And you’ve seen how I’m not the type to change my mind so fast.”

“Oh yes, you’re very stubborn,” Hamea agreed, lightheartedly teasing but relieved all the same. “But I wouldn’t want any less than everything either…”

“I guess we’re both pretty greedy people.”

She nuzzled her nose against Camu’s, leaning in and parting her lips for a deeper kiss than earlier. The soft sound of her contented sigh coaxed him into hungrily drinking in the warmth.

Soon enough, he was nipping at her lower lip, asking for even more and his tongue reaching further.

Every single sensation, he would let it be etched onto him.

To remind himself that this was real, that she is here in his arms, the place she always said she found respite in.

Hamea eventually pulled away with flushed cheeks. She pursed her lips in embarrassment, and quietly asked, “Can I put it in right now?”

“Already prepared for it?” he asked in doubt.

“W-well… I’ve taken you with less preparation before. I can definitely do it now.”

“Then you can wait a bit longer too.”

He moved one of his hands from her hips and reached further below. Hamea mewled as his thumb pressed against her clit, rubbing the sensitive nub. She held onto his wrist, though she made no proper move to stop him in any way.

“Mnnh… but you go so overboard with this,” she mumbled between panting breaths. “Don’t make me cum so fast…”

“Commandant, shouldn’t your endurance be improved by now?” he teased.

Camu took it further and slid two of his fingers inside of her pussy. Slick gradually pooled into the palm of his hand as he slowly pumped his fingers up to the knuckles and getting her used to the gradual stretch. Hamea’s pretty lashes fluttered as she drew out his name in a long moan.

It stirred him up in a special way every time.

“Ah… don’t do so much, don’t do so much at once,” she weakly protested. “I’m going to cum, I really will…”

Hamea knew that Camu liked to be a bit mean in this aspect. He delighted too much in her reactions to hold himself back from overstimulating her, even on nights that were originally meant to be gentle.

Goaded by her mewls of pleasure, he continued his ministrations until she cried out and squeezed tightly around his digits. With her eyebrows scrunched and her lips still pursed together, it made for a rather demure yet lewd expression. He brushed away her bangs once more with his other hand to look at it fully.

He looked at her so intensely, and Hamea loved it so much that it never failed to send shivers down her spine. Perhaps it was a selfish thing to love, but he indulged her anyway.

Once she relaxed again, Camu pulled out—the movement already loud from slick.

“There’s no point salvaging your modesty when you’re soaking like this.” He then thoroughly and languidly lapped up the cum, swallowing deeply for her to witness. “Hm… Good as always.”

“And here I was trying to last a bit longer tonight…”

“Does it matter? I don’t mind doing all of the work either.”

“But isn’t that a bit unfair…?” she asked sheepishly.

“Not to me. As long as we’re both enjoying ourselves, anything is fair game. And for me, that includes seeing you making that face. So don’t hide such a special treat.”

She nodded, too embarrassed to say anything else.

With a shift to make sure she was comfortable in his lap, he carefully aligned the tip and pushed the thick head of his cock inside, hissing through his teeth at how she enveloped him.

“Fuck…,” he cursed under his breath. “Cunt’s so damn tight… ”

Hamea braced herself against his shoulders as she took him inch by inch.

With each shaky sigh she let out, Camu pressed a kiss to her cheek to ease her until she fit his entire length.

“Wait, don’t move yet. I’m still sensitive from earlier,” she mumbled.

“Yeah, yeah, I got it…”

He repeated it purposefully, moreso to remind himself than anything else. After she adjusted, she began to ride his cock, with Camu holding her hips to steady her. His length reached so deeply, consistently hitting the very spot that made Hamea tremble and whine from pleasure. As of this moment, all they could hear was the rhythmic wet slap of skin accompanied by heavy breaths.

Slick continued to spill from her pussy and soaked their inner thighs.

Hamea threw back her head as she moaned in a winded breath. Her nails dropped to his back and dug in, very faintly activating the Construct’s pain receptors.

A part of him wished that it would leave something behind for him to admire in the mornings after, but his skin was made to be incredibly durable. While it was helpful for the places he was usually deployed to, it had small inconveniences like this. But it was fine, he could make do.

He bit down on a small patch of skin on her neck and sucked, leaving a dark hickey behind. He soothed the sting with his tongue before moving on to make another.

Hamea would simply have to bear enough marks for the both of them.

“C…Camu!”

He vaguely recognized through a foggy brain that he was taking control of the pacing after she cried his name—that his hands had secured the back of her thighs and that he was thrusting harder into her squelching cunt. She could only hold onto him as he bounced her ass in his lap.

“Ngh… do you have any idea what it does to me? When you use my name with your pretty little voice?”

Hamea’s whimpers were on the verge of sobbing as she was close to cumming again. The knot in her stomach was tightening, leaving her almost dizzy if Camu’s arms weren’t wrapped so firmly around her figure.

“No no, with you… please? Please?”

It came out incomprehensible, but Camu seemed to understand. He pressed his forehead to hers, soaking his silvery bangs with beads of her sweat that had built up.

“Yeah… we can do that…”

Hamea held his face as she kissed him, heated and deeply as they chased their high together. Their moans and grunts of exertion became muffled, though it did little to silence everything else.

Camu pressed their bodies even closer as he filled her pussy to the brim with spurts of thick pearly-white cum. Her walls were practically milking his cock, making him dig his fingers into the soft skin of her thighs to restrain his excitement. With a few more deliberate rolls of his hips, he slowly pulled out.

The two panted, struggling to catch their breath from the steamy air. A mixture of their cum stained the sheets beneath them, but neither of them had the energy to move yet.

Even without touching it with her hand, she already knew her lips were somewhat swollen. Her eyes flicked over to the sweat on Camu’s forehead and the drool rolling down his chin. She sheepishly wiped it away the best she could.

“You don’t need to do that,” he said.

“It doesn’t bother you?”

“Why the hell would it?” Despite his choice of words, they hardly had any bite to them. “In fact, I think you should look sweaty and messy more often like this actually.”

“Oh, you…!”

Hamea pushed his face and he simply laughed, before nudging her hands away so he could continue admiring the flush on her cheeks.

Everything that he thought of earlier, it really didn’t sound so bad to him. It’s almost embarrassing, really. He’s changed quite a bit by now, and even that felt like an understatement. He should be terrified by the amount of power Hamea had over him in this regard. But no, instead, he’s melting in her presence.

Upon seeing her eyes grow half-lidded from exhaustion, Camu quietly moved to lay her down on the bed, head nestled against his arm. He reached for the blanket and covered both of their bare bodies—hopefully it made her comfortable.

In a whisper, she called out, “Camu…?”

“I’m here.”

“Hand?”

He wordlessly held out his free hand, and she took it with both of hers. She held it in front of her face with awe on her face.

“Hee-hee… I really do love your hands quite a lot. I love… every part of you. I love you…”

She repeated the last few words over and over. As she did, she traced the artificial creases of his hand with her pointer while slowly drifting off. It was only until she went slack and silent that Camu knew she really did fall asleep.

“I love you too.”

He said it with a softness that he used to think was impossible for a person like him. Maybe she did end up hearing it in her sleep. Why else would she have such a… goofy… silly… pretty smile right now?

He wanted to see it every day, every night. If he had to make a fool of himself in front of her for it… maybe some sacrifices were worth it, he said to himself. Then, she would laugh and assure him he was not a fool.

Hamea was right… They were greedy, because he wouldn’t want any less than that. He continued to think this to himself as he tried to estimate the size of her ring finger before dozing off himself.

[lnkedmyheart]

@themoonawaitsherexecutioner

So about how skk would hit different if one or both was a woman is less in regards to how it changes the overall story but how the general energy changes.

For starters if either one of them was a woman while the other stayed a man, the biggest change in their interaction and by extension in the way they are perceived would have been their dynamic. Nobody would have denied the way their interactions are heavily charged with some kind of tension. Sexual or romantic or whatever there is a pull there in canon but with one of them being a woman nobody would deny that they have some kind of subtext there. From Dazai waiting for Chuuya to show up, their banter moving from vitriolic to friendly teasing, to the dead apple scene with the princess-prince analogy, to Dazai catching Chuuya in his arms in sb, the silly little love confession and admitting Chuua was part of the reason Dazai decided to live at the time and even the current meursault situation with the line about the moments where their hearts connected. Remove the mlm or wlw aspect for half a second and people will automatically begin to notice all the subtext present in the story and interactions.

We also know that Dazai is a womanizer who broke many hearts back in the mafia and that his interactions with women tend to be pretty shallow (except Yosano and Koyou) and I think it would have been interesting how that would have changed had Chuuya been a woman. There is a distance between Dazai and the important women in his life, there is also a distance between him and the men, all of them, including Oda (at least from Oda's perspective he never fully grasped how much he meant to Dazai). That distance is entirely absent with Chuuya and it's repeatedly brought up not just in the text but also in their interaction. Dazai has a way of talking to Chuuya and Chuuya can read his words like they're his own thoughts. Dazai is also very physical with Chuuya in general, constantly ignoring his own boundaries all the time. I would love to see how that would change had Chuuya been a woman. It would also lead to a scenario with a woman as the muscle and the man as the thinker/damsel.

The same is true vice versa, how would their interactions with each other change if Dazai was a woman while Chuuya stayed a guy? Chuuya is stated to be very respectful to women by the creators, we know he has a soft spot for little old ladies, but he doesn't underestimate them as was the case with Yosano and he has been raised by Koyou. The point is how would things change in that situation? It would be more traditional, yes. Dazai being the damsel and Chuuya being the rescuer on a surface level but not entirely because Dazai is never actually helpless. I also think the most interesting thing about Dazai as the woman is actually in how it changes a lot of the subtext in general with everyone else in the series and not just Chuuya. Dazai would perhaps be less feared in the mafia as the demon prodigy as a woman because of the potential to underestimate her or maybe even more feared idk. How would it alter her interactions with the men in her life normally. How would Dazai's depression and suicidal tendencies be viewed and treated in the story and how they would affect her. Would there be any major change at all or would there be none.

And lastly if they were both women, again, most of the above points still hold true for this scenario. However there is more here given that there would be heavy subtext with 2 women instead of 2 men. In this situation there would imo be less change in how they interact with each other and more in how the others interact with them and perceive them. (Also I'm a lesbian, wlw is always more fun to me than mlm or wlm lmao).

On a negative sidenote, had one of skk been a woman it would have been less popular of a ship because it would have been a het one.

[benetnvsch]

anyway- I can't keep quiet, I have to be annoying lol, sorry anyway here's some of my thoughts on the new BSD episode- this obvs contains spoilers & none of this will be in order cuz I have no concept of time- put under a break cuz spoilers and it's way longer than I though it'd be,,,

but man,,, Man,,, am I the only one a little disappointed by it being yet another 'Dazai planned it all along' type plot aksdhajh-

chuuya faking vampirism too,, woow ,, who ever would have seen this coming (both Asagiri and Chuuya's va were like 'oh yea Chuuya's important u really see skk's bond in this upcoming season' obvs this doesn't make sense if chuuya actually killed him so we all low-key knew,,,) - maybe chuuya deserved to shoot Dazai,, just a lil bit,,, as a treat,,,

Fyolai's entire thing was ?? so good to me actually,,, I quite liked it pfft- maybe Fyodor deserved to explode (I say this affectionately)- Nikolai's reactions too and the framing of showing only his hidden eye when he's like 'happy' / playing a character but then turning so u only see his scared eye when he's geuininely concerned is so fucking good,,, him changing his mind abt how he felt abt it too,,,

also fyodor's last words being Jesus's when he was crucified ?? foreshadowing or nah?? will he come back?? hmmmm :thank:

aya and bram :''( my beloveds :''(

kunikida is up :) my wife,, love u wife, we flashback to him pumping it right in the middle of fukufuku's dramatic lil flashback(??) thing and i fucking lost it

Fukuzawa not being able to kill Fukuchi and Teruko doing it instead was fuckign ace, perfect moment , best part of the episode imo <3 Fukuzawa's reaction while holding his corpse,,, old man yaoi died today ,,,

OH and sigma? Dazai go back for her pls, u promised her u would get her out alive don't do this (u know Those SKK Stans TM will be annoying af over this Man,,,) ALSO - The Guy ?? Akutagawa and Atsushi are setting off to face?? that's like ?? a different(maybe fucked up revived?) Fukuchi ?? right?? same hair same scars no mustache but sacrifices must be made- he's wearing the same silly mask from the official art released last chapter too ? it's gotta be??

[dobercorgis]

Okay now that I got 5 hours of sleep I think I’m ready to talk abt the final ep

I think it did the good parts really well like the whole fukufuku scene and fukuchi’s death. The way they managed to convey the depth and weight of their relationship was amazing, and the scenery was very pretty. I still think fukuchi’s plan was silly and unrealistic and a bit too idealistic but it made sense. That’s just the guy he is lol. Also going back a little bit, I think their fight was well animated, both in the choreography and emotional sense. And yeah it makes sense why they put so much effort in to the old man yaoi scenes now.

The tears in teruko’s eyes when she ended up being the one to stab fukuchi made me want to scream. I really didn’t like teruko until this moment (I suppose I did grow an appreciation for her bc of her voice acting a few eps ago) but this just completely flipped my opinion of her. And the way she told atsushi to leave them alone to give them their moment was also great.

I’m really interested to see where fukuzawa will go from here because he just got all of these burdens he never wanted placed on him in a matter of seconds. Suddenly he’s credited with killing fukuchi and then the one order which he wants to destroy but he can’t because that would invalidate fukuchi’s death and his purpose in life.

That all being said, I’m not really satisfied with how the prison arc ended. I thought that the prison arc would end up being one of my favorite arcs once it ended (it felt like it was dragging a bit even more bc of monthly releases) but I felt like it all ended a bit too simply?

Chuuya was never a vampire and skk made up their plan on the spot which does show how well they work with each other and how dazai’s different from fyodor, but it did kind of feel like a cheap cop out. Like all that build up and the resolution just kinda… fell flat. I’m not too hung over on it tho it still made sense and serves its purpose.

I honestly expected more with fyodor. Maybe it was bc dazai had this whole convoluted way of contacting the outside so I expected fyodor’s to be over the top as well but his answer was just vampires (again it all makes sense, it was just much simpler than what I expected). I don’t believe that he’s dead there’s no way that man died from a helicopter crash, but even that “death” seemed a bit mundane for someone like him. Nikolai’s reaction and voice acting to fyodor’s death was amazing tho. The way his voice lost its cheerfulness and him debating whether he actually wanted fyodor’s death… very nice.

Also why did dazai just leave sigma in the prison? I don’t think he was joking when he said that he’d make sure sigma would make it out alive. But he started walking away from the prison like sir no go back. His og plan genuinely might’ve been to use sigma to figure out fyodor’s plans that changed when chuuya got here, but I still don’t think he would leave sigma like that.

I don’t think the manga and anime will diverge imo? Iirc asagiri said that he had the prison arc story done like last year, so it’d be weirder if bones went nah we’ll make our own ending. I just hope that the manga will take it at a slower pace and show more moments in between bc the anime felt rushed and felt like it was trying its best to put a ribbon on things. Maybe it feels even more like that bc lbr the manga was going at a snail’s pace for a long time and we were stuck in those 30 minutes for how long now? And all of a sudden it’s like boom time passes.

Also there’s just so many unanswered questions like what about the other half of the page? Is the ada still considered terrorists? Who’s getting transferred to the pm? Where is yosano? Don’t tell me they just forgot to include her. What’s fyodor’s ability and his plans? What the actual fuck is going to happen to sigma? What happened to Margaret actually? How are the pm vampires? Also might be just me but the two hours later scene felt a bit unnecessary. Maybe it was to hype up the manga readers for what’s going to happen and the anime only’s for whenever s6 is going to come out (in several years maybe) but to add that when there’s so many loose threads… I suppose we got to see akutagawa in a new fit tho. I’m praying that these unanswered questions are intentional and they’ll be answered in the manga since the anime tends to gloss over a lot of details or in the beginning of s6 and they just didn’t explain everything for *intrigue.*

This definitely felt like the flimsiest finale we got so far, but we’re finally out of fukuchi and prison hell (although apparently he comes back like 2 hours later).

[sonder-paradise]

Can I request headcannons for Akutagawa and Atsushi fighting over the same person?

◊ characters. atsushi, akutagawa, gn!reader

◊ genre. fluff, university au, shin skk being loving idiots

You initially met Atsushi on your way into class. He held the door open for you as you walked into the lecture hall and he decided to just plop right next to your seat afterwards. Honestly, he just seemed like your run-of-the-mill kind of guy. He offered to help you during class and wrote little notes and doodles on your notes further into the year.

Akutagawa was the one guy you were assigned to be partners with during a work study. He’s definitely the harder one to get along with. But you got used to the way he worked eventually and he slowly adapted to your schedule. Akutagawa gets you coffee or tea in the mornings after he can tell you pulled a late nighter.

Honestly the two of them didn’t even realize they were fighting over you in the first place. The first time they found out you knew both of them was when Akutagawa passed by you and Atsushi in the dining hall. He had to stop before turning the corner because he was just so stunned that that silly Weretiger had gotten to you first.

You just happened to catch him out of the corner of your eye and invited him over to sit. Of course, how were you supposed to know that the two of them had a notorious history of not being able to get along?

Atsushi can tell instantly that Akutagawa is most definitely using you to his advantage. Of course he is! Why else would Akutagawa of all people approach you and be nice to you?

You’re quick to clear up the misunderstanding but it just causes an entirely new problem: They both refuse to leave you alone with the other now.

From the outside, it seems like a cute little trio friend group but you’re smack in the middle of a tug of war and neither boy is able to let go. Atsushi always offers to carry your bags and walk you back to your place. Akutagawa commonly brings you food and drinks as well as offering to buy you whatever you need.

They’ll be the image of perfection and getting along in front of you but behind you’re back they’re quite literally at each others’ throats. They’re kicking each other with jealousy and fire raging in each other’s eyes. It’s almost amusing to anyone else that notices.

“Don’t look at them like that,” Atsushi hisses through an agitated smile.

“Says you. I wouldn’t need to if you were not here,” Akutagawa refutes, entirely unamused with his competitor.

Though, there are moments when you’re with the two of them and neither seem to know how to react. Like the times when you’re studying in the library with them. It’s quiet and they seem sleepy from the late night you all had previously due to finals week.

Atsushi stretches, leaning back in his chair as he shuts his textbook with a low thud. Akutagawa sends him a curt look but says nothing, going back to fidgeting with his pencil as he skims his notes. In the middle sits you and as they both glance to you, they’re surprised to see you sleeping soundly on your books.

The two of them quickly become quiet as mice. Atsushi is quick to check the time, noting it to be about time to get going anyways. He’s tempted to wake you but it seems Akutagawa already has a better idea. The younger man frowns as Akutagawa wraps an arm around your waist and carries you up into his arms. “What are you doing?”

“I’m bringing them back to their place,” Akutagawa explains, eyebrows creasing when Atsushi picks up all of your things. “I can carry those.”

“You? While you’re carrying them? No, I can do it. Plus I have to go with you anyways,” he insists.

“You will do no such-“ Akutagawa pauses, realizing that one: he’s in a library and two: you’re asleep in his arms. Atsushi seems to realize the same as he merely sighs and beckons his partner in crime to follow him out the doors.

For now, they’ve appeared to come to a truce that having you pick both of them as your friends is better than forcing you to pick one as your lover.

But when the time does come: Who will you be picking?

The correct answer is Chuuya (written by a chuuya simp)

Taglist: @missrown @rirk-ke @kiyokoxd @jessbeinme15 @scul-pted @kuraxmasha @yochicoz @pompompurin1028 @trashykawahq @swrdemon @life-sus @foolishestchildofchilds @fyodorscello @kur0-kawa @planetxiao @dazaiaiko @chuuyasboots @ruthdied @allisonlol @questioningmyownexistence @sebtomm @nullified-kiss @nathansside @cuteflowers-101 @sigmafied @boombboi @scarletta-ruan @skgch @daz8i @httpsobi @dazaiscum @thekaylahub @luciferspen @dazaisfavgf @alice0blog @irethepotato @vinyicryes @monastary

[linklethehistorian]

Bungou Stray Dogs: Dazai, Chuuya, Fifteen Years Old Stage Play 

Screencap of the Day: Day 12

Dazai: “That’s the ‘you’ I love!”

Chuuya: “Stop it! That’s so gross I could die!”

Ah yes, the famous line from the novel that all SKK fans who know of it adore, and some others — who apparently don’t get that context is a thing, and it is clearly a joke on Dazai’s part said to make Chuuya annoyed — seem to get their panties in a twist over for absolutely no reason. No, I’m actually not an SKK shipper myself, but I was still incredibly pleased that it was included in this rendition of Fifteen as well, as I feel that Dazai acting it out so flamboyantly this way, with such a cutesy voice and posing like a little schoolgirl confessing to her crush, in front of people can perhaps finally put to bed the nonsense rumor that anyone including any iteration of “I love you” or joking confession-type air to this scene is lying or intentionally “mistranslating” it.

Silly discourse in the community aside, though, this moment is just plain fun and funny to watch in the stage play, and I really loved seeing it unfold in front of me. The way Chuuya jumped so very far away from Dazai after those words was absolutely hilarious, as were the looks of regret Dazai gave after the fact. 😂

Whether you ship SKK, or you’re like me and personally don’t, I hope you all nonetheless enjoy these screencaps and this scene yourselves when the time comes that y’all get to watch it. ;)

[mondofunnybooks]

MONDO FUNNYBOOKS; HITLER, BREXIT THE COMIC ,WEIRD INDIAN GAY PORN AND SADDAM HUSSEIN ON AN OSTRICH!

There was a time where comic creators worked to cause up a stink. Keith Giffen shot a comic (We're still after one, please, Dave or anyone else who worked for Blackball.) Kevin Maguire made ALL of Steve Rogers embossed. Spawn shipped 2 issues out of order. Lobo punched God in the face. Kyle Rayner became a Green Lantern. Barry Windsor Smith said some of the early Image Comics were a bit rubbish while promoting his new book 'Storyteller'. Youngblood: Year One would feature fully painted art by Rob Liefeld, akin to just released hit 'Marvels', featuring painted art by Alex Ross. Tom DeFalco famously declared his new ongoing from Marvel, 'Sleepwalker', would be 'Sandman' done right.

Copies of Sleepwalker are usually found in cheap bins across the Western hemisphere so feel free to judge for yourself how successful he was with that.

But for our money, nobody stirred up trouble like Gregarious Grant Morrison. His interview alongside Mark Millar with Comics World to promote their upcoming mini-series 'Skrull Kill Krew' remains one of the funniest moments of 'What a load of old bollocks this is!' vindictiveness since John Buscema told everyone in his art class to swipe since 'this stuff ain't going in the Lourve, pal.' Some of the less informed American hype rags attempted to suggest that SKK was the natural sequel to Zenith since it would see Morrison reunite with his partner in crime: Steve Yeowell.

Which either means they didn't know, or thought it wiser not to mention a strip that ran in Crisis circa 1990 called 'New Adventures Of Hitler'.

We'll come back to Crisis in more depth because it's probably the answer to the question a lot of the UK retailers are asking at the moment: How do we get people reading comics again. Crisis or something like it would be a good attempt, featuring a ton of original strips in a format that didn't suggest it ought to be stocked amongst a bunch of plastic bags full of toys and a magazine. Crisis also featured two of our favourite stories: 'Dare' which finished off from the sadly cancelled Revolver (Again, more another time.) as created by Grant and Rian Hughes and 'Trip To Tulum'. Which oddly was the only way to find the English translation of the collaboration by Milo Manara and Federico Fellini for quite a long time. God knows how they even got that in the first place.

NAH featured in issues 46-49 and surprised a few newsagents opening their delivery at 5am across the UK when confronted with 'Mr Hitler's Holiday', featuring your man from The Third on a bike against a dirty lurid purple cover. NAH concerned itself with Adolf taking a trip to Liverpool from 1912-1913 and learning a few tricks about fascism from the English while reality warps itself silly around the wee lad. Morrisey shows up singing 'Heaven Knows i'm Miserable Now'. A bunch of randoms begin chanting 'Hitler Has Only Got One Ball' on a bus he's on leaving the future Fuhrer mystified and mortified.

'NAH' originally ran in something called 'Cut' magazine but one of the editors, also someone from a band called 'Hue & Cry' having a strop so either 'Cut' itself stopped or at least stopped running the story. In any event, it migrated over to Crisis. It's rather excellent and while we don't know who owns the rights to it, it's one of those things that really ought to be in print.

Speaking of which......

Those more in the know will have to explain it to us, because the common answer is 'Because Grant and Mark aren't friends anymore.' and we're not sure that's how book publishing works, but the question is obviously 'Why isn't Big Dave in print?' If ANY comic were a timely insight into the mindset of the Brexit voting population of the UK, 'Big Dave' prophetically nails it like a time bullet fired from 1993. Essentially a high budget Viz strip beautifully pencilled by Steve Parkhouse, BD is a series of increasing ludricious adventures featuring that wide necked bloke in an England shirt with a bulldog tattooed to his forehead you see every St George's Day with a copy of The Sun in his back packet. It is ludicriously sexist, homophobic, racist and pro-monarchy.

Or at least the character is. Quite a few people seemed to confuse 'the portrayal of an attitude' with 'the glorfication of same attitude'. 2000AD apparently getting a bit narky if you bring this not being in print up. Frankly, if you don't find Dave having a threesome with Princess Di and Sarah Ferguson funny, you're probably reading the wrong column. We'd like to see this back in print. And please, please do not feel compelled to update this strip the same way 'DR & Quinch' was earlier this year. We'll stick that little relaunch in the same bin as the 'Femme Fatales/What if our artists swiped from Loaded and stuck some 2000AD related costumes on the art.' supplement from 1994, aye?

Finally, we go from the unreprintable to the never even published and perhaps not even written!

Unless somebody does something incredible, we will probably go to our graves saying that 'Kill Your Boyfriend' by Morrison & Bond is the best single story in comics ever published. This, before old men start getting heart attacks, does not include long form series, mini-series, single graphic novels, cartoon strips, etc. In terms of a story that starts, continues and ends in one issue with no knowledge of any other comic ever published, KYB is it. It brings up and destroys the notion of the personality as anything other than a series of reactions to various traumas and conditioning far faster than 'The Dice Man' does and with much funnier results. It could be read as the documentation of how a good acid trip will crack the inner monologue of the ego and set your inner self free, if you were of such a mind. It's certainly one of the best things Vertigo ever did.

'KYB' was part of a line called 'Vertigo Voices' published in 1995. The other books were 'Faces' by Pete 'Shade' The Changing Man'* Milligan and Duncan 'Oh, all the good things' Fegredo a book about why is plastic surgery and what does it say about us that we've conditioned ourselves to believe that there is such a thing as an imperfect face. Also 'Tainted' by Delano and Davidson (we've not read it, but the line up is well sound) and another book that we'll come back to in a bit but what's relevant here is that there was meant to be another comic in this line.

That comic would have been 'Bizarre Boys' by Grant Morrison, Pete Milligan and Jamie Hewlett.

The legend is that a suitably refreshed Grant and Pete were out in India and were looking around at various stalls filled with magazines, amidst the chaos the publication 'Bizarre Boys' caught their eye and was so outlandish (we're not Googling it, but nor are we stopping you from doing so.) that they committed right there to sell a comic with the same title to Vertigo. It got as far as being previewed in Spin Nov 1994 along with talk of an Invisibles TV Show (and come on. PLEASE. Netflix has cleared the deck of all the boring Marvel Superhero things so now is the PERFECT time for the adventures of Lord Fanny And The Other Ones.) but somewhere along the line it simply dropped from the publication schedule with no word of why, although as the comic was to be a fictional biography of Milligan and Morrison's alter egos, it's suggested that they were too busy living the life to settle down long enough to document.

We'd have to make the point that an oral account of the Vertigo offices circa 1994-1996 as spoken by Pete and Grant while drawn by Jamie would be a far more interesting thing to bring us back to the shops for new comics than, well, Tank Girl or Green Lantern.

The following pitch ran as part of The Time Is Now: DC Comics' Editorial Presentation 1994.

'Here's the solicitation copy for Bizarre Boys, which ran as part of The VERTIGO does what it does best in VERTIGO VOICES - a new umbrella title for four distinctive one-shots - where four of VERTIGO's most creatively deranged writers give voice to their most outrageous, gripping and graphic imaginings. Each "VOICE" delivers its own sound, in turn hyperreal, darkly disturbing, irreverent, and biting. FACE is the first "VOICE" to be heard, followed by KILL YOUR BOYFRIEND, and closing with BIZARRE BOYS. These are stories with sounds all their own, tearing a jagged rip through reality.

BIZARRE BOYS, VERTIGO VOICES' most irreverent title, is a story within a story within a story. It's about some fictional characters called the Bizarre Boys, and about the writers who write them and about the writers who are writing about the writers... There are two voices telling the tale of BIZARRE BOYS, and they don't agree with each other at all.

BIZARRE BOYS is a comic about a comic and about the process of putting together a comic. It's a sparkling tapestry of post-modernism and a fast- moving breathless chase across time and space.

It all takes place - naturally - on Bizarre Boys Day, when writers Peter Milligan (SHADE, THE CHANGING MAN) and Grant Morrison (THE INVISIBLES) join forces with artist Jamie Hewlett (SHADE, THE CHANGING MAN, Tank Girl) to tell the tale of two writers called Millison and Morrigan, and their fabulous creations, The Bizarre Boys. Echoing James Joyce's Bloomsday, whatever events happen on Bizarre Boys Day also happen in the comic.

As the two writers begin their quest for the fantastic Bizarre Boys, whose sweat contains miraculous healing and hallucinogenic properties, these latter-day Brothers Grimm weave some dissolute modern fairy tales, take the wraps off the creative process itself, and tell a joke or three.'

We're told by inside sources that elements of 'Bizarre Boys' ran in the final book of The Vertigo Voices line: 'The Eaters' as drawn by Dean Ormston and Pete Milligan.

And that's us for now. What do YOU think? Should these projects remain in the dustbin of FunnyBook History? Maybe Kickstarters, er, started to try and release them as independent books (Lord knows if Cyberfrog can be a thing again, then...) Amazon have begun publishing comics directly from creators like Kyle Baker and Rick Veitch, which could sidestep the whole 'Comics are for kids so why is this in Sainsbury's!?' furor all over again. Image has put out some fairly anondyne nonsense lately and could do with something like this in their line-up. Let us know in the comments and as ever we'll see you in The FunnyPages.

(Big Dave ran as part of 2000AD's 'Summer Offensive' in 1993, some of the most fun the Progs have ever been. Big Dave features in the following issues*:)

"Target Baghdad" (with Steve Parkhouse, in 2000 AD #842–845, 1993) "Monarchy in the UK" (with Steve Parkhouse, in 2000 AD #846–849, 1993) "Young Dave" (with Steve Parkhouse, in 2000AD Yearbook 1994, 1993) "Costa del Chaos" (with Anthony Williams, in 2000 AD #869–872, 1994) "Wotta Lotta Balls" (with Steve Parkhouse, in 2000 AD #904–907, 1994)

*according to Wiki, anyway.

'New Adventures Of Hitler' can be found in Crisis: #46 - 49.

[cheshire-writer]

Yeeees. We have Dazai "I lose things the moment I gain them" Osamu, canon fact. We have after one day of knowing Chuuya, Dazai "I'll give living a try" Osamu, also canon fact. We have Dazai "I spend every waking moment thinking how I can annoy Chuuya" Osamu, also canon. We have Dazai "I spent seven years thinking how to kill Chuuya" Osamu, yet Chuuya is (was?) still alive, once again canon fact.

They 'hate' each other, yet Chuuya is the only one who can understand Dazai's motives (Asagiri's AN in the Dead Apple novel, I think) and Dazai knows every little detail of how Chuuya moves and reacts and lets not forget the gentleness he ever only shows when Chuuya is passed out (SB, DA). Canon.

We have Dazai "Chuuya is the most human to ever human" Osamu (re basically all of SB), canon.

We have Chuuya and Dazai being foils for each other re the question of humanity, also canon.

We have "just two dudes looking for their humanity in each other", barely 'sub' subtext.

We have Dazai and Chuuya keeping each other's number even after Dazai's desertion, with Chuuya Drunk Dialing him!!!, also canon (someone tell me where we learn that).

We have Dazai "the choice is yours" Osamu, who never gives people other than Chuuya an actual choice.

These are all just the basic facts we're looking at with their relationship. (The list is not complete, I'm sure there is more.) Where I'm going with this? My pet theory is that Dazai comes closest to experiencing feeling anything approching actual human normal, is through Chuuya. Chuuya serves as the window for him to touch this to him abstract concept of humanity. Chuuya makes him /feel/ things (spite, annoyance, disgust, hatred, jealousy, glee, + everything our deranged skk brains can come up with). Chuuya motivates him to do things, be it out of pure spite or a determination not to lose to him (for whatever reason). Chuuya makes him /react/ (re 15, SB) when his usual resting face is constantly desribed at half-asleep, half-bored and even a freaking android (Adam, you cinamon roll) is unsettled by him. Simply put, Chuuya gives Dazai life (in whatever form, talking about a scale here). Poetically put, to Dazai, who is always drowning in apathy and depression, Chuuya is (a slap in the face of) fresh air, a shot of adrenaline right in Dazai's blood.

Now to the main point: What if that Chuuya dies?

I think we can agree that Dazai's everyday face, his silly persona, is just that - a persona. No Longer Human quotes also imply that that is nothing but a mask. Looking at BSD Dazai, a mask that is worn to vaguely fit into society, into the ADA. A habit, a defence mechanism, and a premptive manipulative tactic to make others underestimate him. Chuuya dies? I'm of the firm belief that Dazai would go something along the lines of "well, he's a dog and his lifespan was about to run out anyway", maybe with a casual dismissive hand wave. Maybe he'd ramble about finally being free or throwing a party or whatever. On the inside, though, his brain would be kicking into over drive to a) ascertain if Chuuya is really dead and this is not just a ploy b) who killed him c) why d) how (ie is Mori guilty by association/neglect).

Then, once he finds out that yes, Chuuya is dead, he could go on the classic revenge spee, which, while an interesting thought, it too obvious. Going on a revenge spee would mean, after all, admitting that Chuuya mattered enough to him to get avenged (admitting to himself or others, depending on if Dazai was in denial about it). Anyone with half a brain could look at what Dazai did to whoever killed Chuuya and figure out that they managed to hurt Dazai, and hurt him a lot, considering that he's never gone on a revenge spee like that before. And an admittance like that, when Dazai managed to twist the preception of his s*icidal tendencies in such a way that it's /accepted/ as normal, even as everyone knows he's serious (and, on part of the ADA, have plans to drag Dazai back to the world of the living anyway re 55 Minutes (the PM probably too, way back when, no way they didn't, but we don't have any information about that)), seems exceptionally unlikely. Dazai has made it his calling card to be unknowable (Chuuya the only exception (DA Asagiri notes), so to go out into the world and basically scream that hey, actually, the hatrack MATTERED to me seems directly opposed to his usual behavious.

Not that Dazai couldn't still do that, grief makes people do things and all, but I just don't think it's likely.

My theory is that Dazai would try to pretend nothing is wrong (maybe even believe it), keep to his routines, eveything is fine, execpt that he would be...slipping.

Dazai borrowed his moral compass from Oda, but, and this is what can bring the entire card house of Dazai's mo crumbling down, it's reliant on a) Dazai caring and b) Dazai GETTING humanity enough to understand what Oda meant by "saving orphans, protecting innocents". The one who enables Dazai to even vaguely get any of that is his sanity/humanity anchor (honestly, they're one and the same for Dazai) Chuuya. Dazai's relationship with living, values, morals, pain, emotions and DEATH is so fucked up, he needs a control factor outside of himself to gauge where he stands in relation to 'human' ('normal' is too much to ask for). And the only one who's been able to serve that role is Chuuya, despite all the others who canonically have quite some things in common with Dazai (Mori, Fyodor, Shibusawa). Chuuya is the only one because they're foils and because deep down, they are very, very alike (SB, also SB skk relationship analysis). It works ONLY with Chuuya BECAUSE they are so alike. Without Chuuya, Dazai lacks that control factor. Without Chuuya, he has no way of not drifting further and further away from humanity. To the point of no longer being able to work with his borrowed moral comapss. After all, who is to say that he couldn't one day make the to him logical conclusion that hey, death is nice, no one can harm anyone in death, death is safe. So that to protect the innocents/orphans most efficiently, he just...ought to, say, kill all innocents/orphans. Just theoretically. At the end of a long sliding scale.

It'd start innocently, like, say, with him leaning a bit too hard/with too cruel words on a witness or something. With a plan being just This Small Bit past the line of ruthlessness he himself drew into the sand as his ADA-modus operandi. And then he'd slip again. And again. Bodies would pile up, first on semi-accident, then on accidental-purpose, then on efficient-purpose. And again. And more. His attempts would become more frequent, more serious - for added tragedy, Dazai might not even know why he slips and why he can't take the edge off by casual jumps into the river anymore.

He'd keep slipping, and Ranpo would be watching, would have from the very beginning, like Mori, and others would also gradually start to notice -

and then what? Who knows. Maybe Dazai would be successful in an apptempt, maybe he'd set the world on fire cause of boredom/whim/why-not. He wouldn't team up with Fyodor, though, cause he could not care less about abilies, and because he'd never buy rewriting the world to make everything ok again and if he doesn't buy it, what's the point? Maybe he'd get assassinated before that.

Conclusion: Chuuya dies, Dazai's mental health + sanity get vaporized.

Nah everyone asking how and when Chuuya would snap if Dazai died. Where's my how and when will Dazai snap when Chuuya dies girlies?

Like I want deep analysis and shit about Dazai's trauma of losing things the moment he gains them and shit. And boy's obsessed, no way he's prancing out of there normal if that happens.